Time of the Month
by BOoNaNakInG
Summary: It starts out as a normal Sunday in Shigure's house. Then, Haru shows up and sends the house into a panic, and Tohru finds an unepected surprise in the kitchen. My fist story, so feedback very much appreciated.


It started out as a normal Sunday in Shigure Sohma's household. Tohru was making breakfast, Kyo started a fight with Yuki, and Shigure was reminding them not to destroy the house again. All in all a normal Sunday morning. Then Haru showed up. Nothing surprising. The ox boy did admire Yuki after all. It started with Tohru setting breakfast on the table and Haru immediately digging in.

"Damn it, Haru, you just come here to leech off of Tohru, don't you, you pansy?" Kyo started in irritably. He had just lost, yet again, to Yuki. Haru ignored him, continuing to munch on the delicious food Tohru had prepared. "You damn punk! Are you even listening to me? No wonder Rin dumped you! You're such an ass!"

Of course, that was not a smart comment at all on Kyo's part. He got an intense glare from Haru. "What the hell would you know about me and Rin, you dumbass cat?" Yuki chose that moment to walk in the door to the dining room.

"Great, Kyo, just wonderful. You've awakened black Haru this early in the morning?" the rat said with a sigh.

"It's not my fault. It must be his time of the month." Kyo grumbled, stabbing at his food.

"Now Kyo-Chan, don't stab the lovely food Tohru has made for us." Shigure said, walking in rubbing his eyes.

Haru rolled his eyes. "Yes. It is my time of the month. How did you know?" Hiro and Kisa chose that moment to walk into the room.

"Kisa!" Tohru ran over and she and Kisa, as always, filled the room with many hearts.

"This is stupid," Hiro announced, rolling his eyes and wandering off. After Tohru and Kisa finally let go of each other, Kisa decided to ask a question that would determine the fate of the morning.

"Ummmm Onee-Chan, what did Haru-San mean when he said it was his time of the month?" There was dead silence as everyone considered the question. It was Shigure that broke it.

"Well, Satchan, you see, every month girls have this issue, down low, you know where guys-" Shigure got smacked by Kyo. "Well, anyway, it kinda bleeds and makes them moody so its hard to-" once again hit by Kyo.

Kisa sat pondering this for a minute. "Does that mean Haru-San is a girl?"

At this point, Haru was beginning to think that he could have a bit of fun with this. "I've been found out. Yes, Kisa, I am a girl."

"EEEEEEEEEEH?" came an explosive shout from Tohru as she frantically spazzed out. Yuki sighed and headed upstairs to escape the insanity.

"Don't believe him, Tohru, he's just messing with you," Kyo said derisively, eating his food once again.

"Oh, no, Kyo-Kun! You mustn't disrespect Haru like that! He decided to tell us and we should be grateful!" Tohru insisted empathetically, while Kisa nodded in agreement. Both looked utterly shocked.

"He's hugged you and turned into an ox before, you know. Doesn't that mean he's a guy?" pointed out Kyo, sensibly.

"Yeah, cuz I'm half girl and half guy." Haru put in.

"EEEEEEEEH?" Tohru was spazzing out again.

"Whatever," Kyo said as he finished off the rest of the food. "Tohru, get me some more from the kitchen, will ya?" Tohru got up and took Kyo's plate into the kitchen. "And you," Kyo said as she left the room, "quit teasing her."

"Yeah whatev-" Haru was cut off by a very red faced Tohru running into the room, yelling "Sorry, sorry!" back into the kitchen. Kyo rolled his eyes and got up to go see what the big deal was. He did not expect the sight that met his eyes.

There, in the middle of the kitchen, were Momiji and Hiro, kissing each other with a passion. Hiro looked over at Kyo. "Do you mind?" he said, glaring at Kyo.

Kyo started yelling all sorts of unintelligible things at Momiji and Hiro, while a red faced bunny and a glaring rabbit stood there holding hands sweetly. Tohru and Kisa were still freaking out in the living room, because Shigure had just informed them that Haru was, in fact, a guy. Yuki, hearing the insane noise from up in his room, sighed. And so ended another crazy morning in Shigure Sohma's household.


End file.
